There’s something wrong with all of us. If we’re not chubby, or funny looking, we’re stupid or awkward. But as life would have it, we are also doubly blessed with talents. And if we focus on these talents to overcompensate for our shortcomings, they will be at the forefront of what people see in us, or so we hope.
We all can’t be ‘the beautiful people’. We all can’t lead the perfect lives, or what’s considered perfect by society’s standards. No matter how much we feel we deserve it. Some of the best people in this world go to bed lonely and unfulfilled. All because of our two biggest flaws as a people: judgment and insecurity. We take the measure of a person by what they look like, and how they present themselves. We predetermine other’s responses to us by the way we measure ourselves against others. An example: the average looking woman wearing jeans and sneakers knows her chances of a man in his car taking notice of how cute she is enough to say so as she walks across the street are slim to none. However, the beautiful woman, artfully dressed, knows her chances are a little better of getting, if not some type of audible acknowledgement, a silent admirer. He will be thinking about her stride in her pencil skirt, and the way her hair moved in the breeze for- well, until the next time he sees a beautiful woman. Given a different situation where a lady that’s more intelligent than good looking gets a chance to flex what they have, it would still take the right guy to notice the beauty of her intellect and take his eyes off the prettier girl.
Guys don’t have it any easier. You have the societal burden of actually making the first move with a woman. Not only do you have this burden, but the task of sounding half intelligent when you meet a woman for the first time. Or risk a blow to your already fragile egos. But as usual, women being smarter (hehe) we figured if we wait on you we’d be single forever, so we’ve started helping some of you out. No thanks necessary. But in my opinion, when women lead, guys don’t get the girl they really want, they just get the girl they feel like is accessible to them since any girl is better than no girl. You know the one that requires as less work as possible. When they finally see what they want, or their confidence level increases, that’s when the infidelity kicks in.
I really believe ’the good life’ leaves out the real cream of the crop. The people who have enough understanding to make a relationship work, the looks to make above average looking children, and the initiative to strive for a better than average income. Not saying that the possibility of finding all three traits in one person isn’t slim, or there aren’t exceptions to every rule. But for the most part, we hold ourselves back. Yeah buddy, you’re funny-looking, you have the personality of a pet rock, and your self-esteem is in the dirt, but you have the ‘Great Equalizer’: money. You actually expect Miss Perfect to actually love you for who you are and not your money. The bad part about it is Miss Frumpy doesn’t want you either. She’s got a higher than normal income, so instead of loving someone who would love her honestly, she would rather have the lazy but handsome Rico Suave who doesn’t have a job sit on her couch and play Xbox on her couch all day until she gets home.
This makes relationships a dilemma for those who have their own standards, no matter what those standards are. For example, Miss Independent, a moderately intelligent career-oriented woman with slightly above average physical features and high self esteem may not go for the highly intelligent shorter than average guy with slightly below average looks with moderate self esteem. She’s looking for the equally career-oriented, above average height and physicality that she feels is a true mirror of what she deserves. But sadly, Mr. Above average wants Miss Perfect ten beauty queen with below average intelligence whose sole goal is to become a trophy wife. Since he’s looking for someone to manipulate with the lifestyle he can provide, he doesn’t want the power play with an equal.
So this moderately intelligent woman, with slightly above average looks with great income potential will have to shift her gears, and sacrifice by being a bit more realistic about what she expects to find in a man. Mr. Intelligent thought his wit, thoughtfulness, and self-demeaning sense of humor would work to make Miss Independent comfortable with coming to terms with his imperfections. And he is a great guy. Very loyal, hardworking, considerate, and he adores her. Everything she looks for in a person. But she looks at his early male pattern baldness and the fact that flat feet run in his family and more than two members of his family sound like Bobcat Goldthwaite, and reconsiders how important childbirth is to her. As good as Mr. Intelligent is, if Mr. Above Average showed her one iota of attention, she would pursue him although she knew nothing would come of it.
With all this miscommunication between our perceptions and expectations, you would think escorts, companions and the like would be more popular. What with the real desirables being escorts and companions…